Cartoon Archive

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Truth be told, your company is kind of a loser if it hasn't been hacked.
Did you hear? Amazon is buying Texas.
I don't know you, but I was wondering if it would be OK if I take you as a tax deduction.
The Marketing Department wants us to replace the quarterly reports with this smiley face.
I don't know, Bob. Given our 28-day lifespan, do we really need to worry about retirement?
With Brexit, I suppose that means that we can't sing in the EuroVision contest.
I thought I understood my investment advisor once, but then I didn't.
Would you mind terribly if I put a few of my eggs in your basket? I'm trying to diversify.
I come here sometimes even if I don't need to, just so I can practice being patient.
I feel above average if I stay at this end of the pool.
Last year I took my own advice. Now I'm suing myself.
I'm seeking conventional wisdom.
Our models show that you need 587 investments in order to be fully diversified. By happy coincidence, that means your portfolio is so complex that we need to manage it.
Excuse me. Do you think the price of these handbags might crash anytime soon?
These are my Tesla-colored glasses. With these, the stock price makes sense... and I can see peace in the Middle East... and some flying pigs.
Oh, I can't read palms. I just like to hold hands.
I told them to think outside the box... and then they all quit.
Carl, I thought you said you learned your lesson about chasing parked cars.
I'm getting ready for the next crisis.
I'd like you a lot more if you were tax deductible.
You're the ghost of Christmases to come? Before we get started, can you tell me what the stock market is going to do next year?
It's OK.  It's a hybrid.
Based on our polling, Bob, you're doing well among the intentionally ignorant.
Frankly, I'm looking for a level playing field.
I always shop here.  They have morally superior produce.
Now I remember. I think we need to diversify our portfolio.
And in this piece of both business and fashion news, the market is looking for a bottom.
You know, from this angle, it doesn’t look half bad.
For 2003, I see another El Nino phenomenon, which will result in a larger than normal fish catch in the western hemisphere...Either that, or my kids swapped my crystal ball for the fishbowl again.
I invest only in 'no brainer' stocks. My results aren't very good, but at least I don't have to think too hard.
We need to start working on the perfect storm of excuses.
Hey. Hey you. Scat. We've saved for retirement. Go on. Shoo!
I'm forecasting higher employment in the US for 2004. The bad thing about that is that we'll probably get fewer walks. The good thing is we'll get to spend more time on the sofa.
Yeah. I'm thinking about skipping that whole career/work thing and easing right on into retirement
I know I'm below average, but I figure that should still get me a few million a year.
Our motto is the same as before we got caught: You can trust us. But now we really, really mean it
I appreciate your forecast for stock returns, but I was kind of hoping for something about my love life.
Well, that about wraps up the meeting... If I give you a head start, would you mind terribly if I chase you to your car?
I hope you don't mind. I took our stock returns for the year and bought a sandwich.
I think I'm getting the hang of this forecasting business.
I'd say this qualifies as a crisis.
I like a stampede as much as the next guy, Ned, but I'm a contrarian investor now.
I guess we should add cow to the list, Wilson. Don't want to catch a falling cow.
You have to admire the guy for being consistent.
This time, try tying your shoes first.
I don't understand most of what my broker says, but I really like it when he calls something a 'dead cat bounce.'
So for my last wish...I said to the genie, I don't ever want to pay taxes again.
Would you mind picking up an extra bag of dog food, just in case, you know, the whole financial system comes crashing down?
May I have my allowance in Euros?
I'd like to make a few investments -- and could you super-size the returns?
Can you give me just a few more minutes? I need to bump up my insurance coverage.
I don't know, Phil. A submerging markets index doesn't sound so hot to me.
The only way we can make the budget work is to stop feeding the cats...Well, that wasn't so difficult.
Spot the early saver
Speaking as a potential beneficiary, this pyramid project worries me.
OK, I get it.  Less debt equals more flexibility.  But if this has anything to do with our anniversary, you’re toast.
I took a little bit of everything…at first it looked exciting, now it looks yucky.
I figure if I take on a little more risk my portfolio will do better.
I want to eat more Chinese food, too. I'm just saying we should put that on our New Year's resolution list rather than our financial checklist.
We have high fees and terrible performance, but we give a very nice fruit basket at the end of the year.
Oh, we don't take complaints anymore, but we can be your friend on Facebook.
Oh, I've learned my lesson awright. Never rob a bank that begins with a 'W'.
This fortune teller told me I won't need to worry about retirement... But now I don't know whether I should go see a financial advisor or a doctor.
I think of myself as a long-term stock opportunity. I'm not too popular, but I do well on any sort of weighing mechanism.
My advisor says buy and hold is dead, says we should be nimble, get in and out of the market, stay on our toes.... Do we even have toes?
Sure I'm a long-term investor...wait, are we talking dog years or people years?
I don't know, Bob. I don't think more advertising is the answer.
The reception stinks, but I think someone from Wall Street said 'sell'... Either that or 'buy Shell'......Maybe she said 'sell the radio'
And for my next trick, I'll make the stock market disappear.
My computer forecasting models didn't work in 2008, so I'm going back to the one tried and true method.
It's time to clean up, young man. This place looks like Wall Street.
You don't want to go into that part of the neighborhood; it has a bad reputation. That's where the investment banks are.